Am I a husband beater?

No, I'm not. Really.

But I did do something stupid last night that has give my husband and friends a good giggle - at my expense. I guess I deserve that.

Let me preface by explaining: I HATE being tickled, and I HATE having my toes messed with. Specifically, I can't stand having my toenails played with. My husband thinks it's fun entertainment to grab my bare feet and flick my toenails because I spaz out. I go into "whacking out" mode - kicking at him to get away and punching his arms to make him stop.

He knows I absolutely hate this. He thinks it's funny - I don't. At all.

Last night he grabbed my feet and started with the toe flicking thing. I wasn't in the mood and decided I wasn't going to put up with it. I wasn't really mad, in truth - just not willing to giggle and put up with it. So I punched his arm - very hard - with my right hand. After a few good punches - which obviously don't make him stop his toe attacks, he decided to block my right arm (because he says I hit too well with it), which left me with no alternative but to start with my left hand.

I couldn't get good leverage, so instead of a punch, I slammed my left fist down on his arm. It hit his shoulder instead and I felt something pop in my hand.

When I howled in pain the doofus stopped his toe assault, but it was too late. The damage had been done. I don't think I actually broke anything - but I do think I cracked a bone. It's not bruising - but it really hurts. And movement is somewhat limited - just because it hurts to do too much.

I don't want to go to the ER to have it x-rayed because I'm not about to tell them I hit my husband. They wouldn't understand even if I told the whole story. For the record, Sam is 6'2", 250 pounds of biker-type intimidation, I am 5 feet of mush - I really don't think I could hurt him if I tried.

So - am I guilty of spousal abuse? I don't think so. He started it.